PARENTING WITH. Amy Fink (pictured above), the founder of Colorful Minds Parent Coaching in Eau Claire, wants to let local families know she is a resource. Parent coaching — a field that flips the traditional approach to supporting children — supports parents as much as their children.

The school pickup line. Bedtime battles. Meltdowns in the grocery store. If you’re a parent, you know these moments – and you know the sinking feeling that follows: Am I doing this wrong?

Amy Fink, founder of Colorful Minds Parent Coaching in Eau Claire, has a message for struggling parents: “You’re not broken. Your child’s not broken. Kids don’t come with manuals – one day you’re just a parent. But it doesn’t have to be so hard.”

After 12 years teaching elementary school, Amy witnessed firsthand how today’s children face increasing pressures and stress at younger ages. But more importantly, she saw how parents were carrying the weight of feeing like they were failing when their children struggled.

“Behind closed doors, everyone else is having issues too,” Amy explains. “Parents feel like they’re on this island, alone, and the world is falling apart. But no – it’s happening to everyone. We’re in this together.”

This realization led Amy to discover parent coaching, a field that flips the traditional approach to helping children. Instead of focusing primarily on changing a child’s behavior, parent coaching centers on empowering parents with the tools and understanding they need to create deeper connections with their children. 

“There doesn't need to be a ‘big anything’ to get started.’ I work with parents who simply want to connect more deeply with their children.” — Amy Fink, founder of Colorful Minds Parent Coaching

Parenting with, not over

Amy’s approach, grounded in neuroscience and trained through the Jai Institute of Parent Coaching, focuses on what she calls “connected parenting” – moving from parenting over or under children, to parenting with them.

But what do these different styles actually look like? Amy breaks it down simply:

Parenting Over: The classic authoritative, control-heavy approach where you call the shots and enforce rules from “I know best” – the kind many of us grew up with.

Parenting Under: The permissive route where you let things slide, overly yielding to avoid conflict.

Parenting With: The sweet spot of co-creating relationships built on mutual respect, clear structure, and connection – where you both lead together.

“Connection means children get choice, their voices are listened to through active and reflective listening, and they’re part of the conversation,” Amy explains. “They’re spoken to with gentle connection, understanding, and love. Their feelings are valid.”

This might sound simple, but Amy knows it requires parents to do their own inner work first. The key lies in co-regulation – a process where parents learn to identify and process their own emotions, fears, and limiting beliefs so they can remain calm and present when their children become overwhelmed.

“The portion of a child’s brain that regulates their nervous system isn’t fully developed until age 25,” Amy notes. “We can’t change a child’s behavior, but we can control how we respond to that behavior. When parents can regulate themselves, they create safety and security that helps their children learn to regulate too.”

Breaking generational patterns

Much of Amy's work involves helping parents recognize generational parenting patterns — the unconscious ways we parent based on how we were raised.

Sometimes this means unlearning habits that no longer serve their families.

“You know the things your kids do that drive you crazy? They learned it from you, and that's why it drives you crazy,” Amy says with warmth, not judgment. “When parents get curious about their triggers and underlying needs, they can begin to see their children for who they truly are.”

Amy guides parents through this process using evidence-based approaches like the ANCHOR and HARBOR methods, helping them develop what she calls their “window of tolerance”— the ability to stay regulated even during challenging parenting moments.

Beyond crisis: building connection

While many families seek Amy's help during difficult periods, she emphasizes that parent coaching isn't just for crisis moments.

“There doesn't need to be a ‘big anything’ to get started,’ ”she says. “I work with parents who simply want to connect more deeply with their children.”

Amy offers both individual parent sessions (virtual or in-person) and combined parent-child sessions that incorporate play-based learning. Even when children are involved, the focus remains parent-centered.

“The child's emotional learning comes from their parents,” Amy explains. “So while we might play with children to help them understand their emotions, I'm always building on how to support the parent as they support their child.”

A community approach

Looking ahead, Amy envisions expanding beyond individual coaching to create group sessions and self-paced modules for busy families. She's also developing resources for anyone who works with children — teachers, caregivers, and community members who want to understand child development and their own responses to children's behaviors.

“It's not rocket science, but it is brain science,” Amy says, describing how she helps parents understand what's happening in their bodies and their children's bodies during emotional moments. “Emotion is just our body's way of keeping us safe.”

The outcomes Amy sees in families vary, but common threads include parents becoming more aware of their triggers, learning developmentally appropriate expectations, recognizing when they're parenting “over” versus “with” their children, and discovering how to make everyday tasks more enjoyable for the whole family.

Getting started

For parents ready to explore this approach, Amy offers free 30-minute consultations to discuss individual situations and how parent coaching might help. Her website provides additional resources for families wanting to begin their journey toward more connected parenting.

“We only know what we know, and we're doing the best with what we have,” Amy emphasizes. “Parenting is hard sometimes, there is support available, and you don't have to do it alone.”

To learn more about Colorful Minds Parent Coaching, including free resources and consultation scheduling, visit ColorfulMindsParentCoaching.com. Amy Fink completed her seven-month coaching certification through the Jai Institute of Parent Coaching and serves families throughout the Eau Claire area and beyond through virtual sessions.

Colorful Minds Parent Coaching

Address: 131 S. Barstow St., Suite 202, Eau Claire

Phone number: (715) 210-4302

Website: ColorfulMindsParentCoaching.com

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