A fresh crop of clothes are bought. Lunches are prepped nightly. Routine has finally returned to the household after a long and gorgeous summer. For me, school, routine, and a slower pace couldn’t have come too soon. But each night while preparing dinner, I can’t help to look at the summer bucket list hanging on the fridge next to the family calendar, and feel a tinge of guilt – the one that comes along with another end to the season of fun, freedom, and family. With each glance at the list, nagging questions start to invade my otherwise peaceful mind. Did we get out to explore enough? Why didn’t I set up that play date like I said I would? We really should have met up with friends more often. I wish I could have gotten that done.

As a former teacher, I used to think of summer as a chance to cram in every adventure and experience I couldn’t get to during the school year. Every day I planned on having a specific adventure coordinated so I could get it all in. Every August I would feel incredible guilt when I didn’t do more to make those adventures come to fruition or didn’t take the time to prepare for the coming year. I complained that I never had enough time to get it all done, leaving me feeling anxious and deflated.

Now that I’m no longer teaching, I’ve learned that what’s important is not the feeling of I should have, but the feeling of I did. I try to take a few moments and think about all of the adventures, fun and laughter that did take place within the past few months. I may think about what I should have accomplished for a few moments, but then I remind myself of what I did accomplish. This summer my deck was filled with flowers and life, and it became a relaxing place to entertain family and friends. I taught my daughter how to ride a bike so the whole family could venture out on the trails together. I took a few moments to enjoy the weather and recharge my own batteries by taking a rare “me-cation.” All of these accomplishments bring on the feelings of empowerment and confidence, as opposed to guilt or stress.

I have also begun to realize that the self-imposed shame of not scheduling everything into a few sunny summer weeks doesn’t have to be so ... shameful. The sense of relief I feel when releasing that guilt (and the realization that our seasonal bucket list is really a set of guidelines) is an important part of transitioning into autumn. And I try to remind myself that just because the days are getting shorter and the temperatures are getting cooler, it doesn’t mean that outdoor adventures, family fun days, and weekend cookouts with friends have to stop. All of this can still take place within the few crisp weeks we have left before the winds change and the snow falls. For me, that’s an encouraging thought to live by.