1. Murder

There wasn’t a single instance of this most infamous of crimes in Eau Claire last year, according to a just-published Eau Claire Police Department report. That big statistical goose egg is one of the reasons Eau Claire consistently ranks as one of the safest cities in the nation. (Let’s keep it that way!)

2. Robbery With "Other Dangerous Weapon"

Thankfully, robbery is pretty rare here, with just 18 cases reported last year. Nine were at gunpoint, two were at knifepoint, and seven were classified as “strong arm (hands, fists, feet)” – which raises the curious concept of being held up at footpoint. Meanwhile, there were zero robberies in the “other dangerous weapon” category, meaning the streets evidently are free of assailants armed with brass knuckles, bo staffs, or nunchakus.

3. Purse Snatching

Apparently, other than in movies involving foot chases through crowded street markets, purse snatching is pretty rare. In fact, exactly zero of them were reported between 2010 and 2015, according to the ECPD. By comparison, there were 10 pocket-pickings in 2015. Gentlemen, that’s an argument for wearing a man purse if we ever saw one. (Sadly, there will be at least one purse-snatching in the report for 2016; a man was just convicted of grabbing a woman’s purse at a restaurant in February.

4. Arson of Mobile Property

Having your house lit on fire is a bummer, and so is having your stuff set ablaze. Fortunately, both are uncommon in Eau Claire. Only one arson of a structure was reported last year, and there were zero arson cases involving mobile property, so you probably don’t need to carry that fire extinguisher on your bike anymore.

5. Bombing

Everyday paranoia about terrorism aside, bombings just don’t happen here. According to police, there were no bomb explosions, no bombs found, and no other bomb-related cases. In fact, there were only three bomb threats reported, which means that most of Eau Claire’s malcontents are apparently smart enough not to pull hoaxes that could get them in trouble with the feds.