Waiting in the express line at Copps, I read the latest tabloid
headlines and learn that the world’s monsters are out of control, and
while top scientists can’t explain it, I think I know why Nessie has
started killing people.  Meanwhile the woman in front puts 18 items
including six cans of dog food on the 10-item conveyor, and I read
that Chupacabras, the vampire predator from Puerto Rico, has been
sucking the blood of household pets.  When the cashier raises a
rutabaga to ask, “What is this anyway?” I am appalled.  Bigfoot’s
attacks on the unsuspecting are up 300 percent, and Lizard Man has
clubbed a woman to death in South Carolina.  The guy in the next lane
is arguing with his lover over Ben and Jerry’s while Indiana’s Giant
Turtle has knocked down 12 garages and trompled the cars inside.
Someone has pushed a cart into the back of my legs, and now Skunk
Apes are raising a stink in Florida and half man/half alligator
marauders are on the rise there, too.  Maybe it’s the water, I think, as
my purchases are totaled.  The cashier calls someone older to scan the
wine while I note that the Abominable Snowman has formed an army
in Tibet, and the furry creatures have been seen marching through the
mountains carrying spears and sharpened snow shovels.  All of this
conspires to make me wonder what the world is coming to.  The
bagger asks, “paper or plastic?” and I nod, knowing that any minute
New York City’s gators will mutate into Republicans.  It’s good to
know Mothman is flying again.

Karla Huston lives in Appleton, Wisconsin and was one of the featured poets in The Chippewa Valley Book Festival 2013. “Run Amok” originally appeared in Outside of a Dog,  Dancing Girl Press, 2013, and is reprinted here with permission of the author. To learn more about Karla visit KarlaHuston.com

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Journey Ahead

We all get old. In fact, some of us, right at this very moment, ARE old. V1's guide to challenges and opportunities of growing older in the Chippewa Valley. Presented by the ADRC of Eau Claire County