If you’ve happened to tune in to just about any news broadcast recently, you’ve most likely been confronted with at least one of the faces of the victims of suicide. Since January there have been, to date, at least 11 publicized suicides that are related at to the bullying and harassment of lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender teenagers. We are in the midst of a domino effect that is reaching crisis proportions.

As a concerned citizen, I’d simply had enough. Along with fellow entertainer Khloe Wold, I understood these issues needed to be addressed before one of these tragedies happen in our own community. On Monday, Oct. 11, we were astounded to play host to more than 250 area residents at a candlelight vigil held in Phoenix Park. Our intention with this event was to be the catalyst for a local discussion of how we can affect change in the Chippewa Valley and, in the process, to perhaps educate and promote compassion.

I’m happy to say it seems our intentions have proven effective. Following the coverage of our event on one of the local news affiliate websites, a heated debate about whether the vigil was an over-sensitive reaction to an issue that’s merely being overblown by the media ensued. The comment most reiterated was that teenagers of all backgrounds and differences have been bullied for years. Why not hold a vigil for those taunted because of their weight, their disabilities, their penchant for academic greatness? One citizen even went so far to make the statement that the current rash of suicides were a poor argument that LGBT citizens should be allowed to serve openly in the military if they couldn’t even make it through high school without “jumping off a bridge.”

As someone who calls the Chippewa Valley home, these responses did not shock me. There aren’t too many “clever” allegories that haven’t already been used to call me unacceptable or inappropriate. I, however, understand that remaining more civil than these arguments may help to give me more credibility in my response to these questions.

With 11 teenagers with one common factor dead, it ceases to be appropriate to compare these instances to a mere rite of passage. Yes, teenagers always have been bullied. Yes, everybody has at least one personal quirk that they can be taunted for. What sets these teenagers apart?
 

It only takes so many times to tell a person how worthless they are until they believe it and suicide seems no longer a choice, but a necessity to end their pain. Not only were one of these teenagers told to hang himself daily by classmates, but then they go home to parents that also rail against these issues that set them apart. They see it on the news: politicians arguing over whether they should have the right to marry, to serve in the military. They see outrageous indifference to children’s deaths in the comments of news websites. Sometimes it’s worthwhile to ponder if we should be celebrating the fact that there have been so few deaths. Those that manage to make it through unscathed in hostile circumstances truly seem superhuman. I can attest to this, because although I had a difficult time in my teens, my research during the planning of this vigil turned up tales so incredibly wrenching and inhumane I felt downright lucky to have had it so easy.

Our event that evening was not in-your-face or even overly political. It was merely a peaceful gathering of concerned citizens who would prefer to confront these factors rather than lose a young life in our own community. Information on support resources and organizations was offered. Courageous speakers of all ages shared their experiences with adversity. The candles to honor those who felt there was no empathy in the world lit up the banks of the Chippewa River for two hours. Those who attended, while heartbroken for people they knew only from photographs, left optimistic. I can only hope that the news of our gathering reached the ears of any child in the area that may feel as hopeless.

If you do need support, call the Trevor Lifeline suicide hotline at 866-4-U-TREVOR.