I’m making my summer reading list right now, and so far there are two things on it: The Clique series by Lisi Harrison and some Nancy Drew books. I came to this conclusion in the book section at Goodwill where I found both of these things.

Now, I understand that as an adult, I’m supposed to “do better” at everything or whatever, and I’m probably supposed to be solving global poverty or climate change or, God forbid, reading Infinite Jest on the beach – a surefire way to ruin an already-fleeting summer. But I can’t do it. I’ve hit a wall. COVID is finally leaving the party after trashing the house (thanks for coming!), and now here comes AI for my job. So forgive me if my reading list is a little dumb and I like it that way. It feels right. 

Can I tell you some of the titles that are on my shelf right now? I need to tell you because I think you’ll understand:

1. Dial L for Loser
2. Revenge of the Wannabees
3. It’s Not Easy Being Mean
4. Sealed with a Diss

I know you’re not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but I’m judging by the title, which I think is a loophole, and I’m here for it. Sometimes things just need to be fun.
My mom and I started reading one of the Nancy Drew books in the car on the way back from Goodwill. I mean, I was driving, and she was reading out loud, don’t worry. So far what we have is the promise of ghosts of dead canoers who swamped in a lake and apparently couldn’t swim (why are you in a canoe?!?!), and then later, inexplicably, some sort of island filled with ghost horses. This one is called … wait for it … The Haunting of Horse Island.

Nancy (how old is she??) is supposed to be out at this lakeside resort to get a break from all her relentless mystery-solving, but surprise surprise, this resort is *absolutely packed* with apparent ghosts, so she’s going to have to get to work. She’s an essential worker, and I sincerely hope she’s getting paid well. Now that I say that, do you think that AI can do girl-detective work? If not, I think I know my next move.

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Now, I understand that as an adult, I’m supposed to “do better” at everything or whatever, and I’m probably supposed to be solving global poverty or climate change or, God forbid, reading Infinite Jest on the beach

A surefire way to ruin an already-fleeting summer. But I can’t do it.

laura buchholz

writer

I have questions about Horse Island, though. Having been a camper and then a counselor at Camp Manitou in the dark ages of the 90s, I am aware that an island in the middle of a lake is not usually a large parcel of land, unless we’re talking about Isle Royale, but that’s a special case. So I’m not sure how a whole pack of horses got out there and then died, but I’ll tell you in September. Probably the rent at the stables went up too much and they had to swim for it. We all know what that’s like.

Now, if this were a social media post and I were gunning for engagement — which I am not, on any level — this is the point at which I would ask, “What are YOU reading this summer” without caring at all what the answer is. I would simply be asking for likes and clicks. But I’m not doing that. I don’t care what you’re reading. Oh, it’s Infinite Jest? Great. Good for you. 

I’ll be out there toggling between tales of mean girls and a girl detective. If it sucks, I’ll try something else. It’s time to have fun. Goodwill has lots of books. And I might soon have a lot of time to read.