Opening Letters

A Not-Ready-for-Primetime-Player

believe it or not, I actually have a problem with there being so much to do around here

Jodie Arnold, illustrated by Erik Christenson |

A few weeks ago, I got a Facebook invite from my friend Justin. He was having his musical debut down at the Bottle and Barrel and wanted me to go. Well, me and every other friend he has on Facebook. My friend Gab messaged me (I’m a fan of any technology that makes it less necessary for me to talk on the phone) and asked if I was going. I mean, HELLO. This wasn’t just our “friend.” This was the guy she and I both had a crush on since the day he first started 7th grade with his groovy Vanilla Ice haircut. I was all set to RSVP when I noticed the show’s start-time. 10 pm. On a THURSDAY??? WHAT? Do none of these “artsy people” work before noon?

I call these experiences “time shockers” and sadly, they seem to be happening to me more often. I look at the calendar of events in Volume One, get all jazzed about the monster movie showing Skin Prints is hosting at The Mouse Trap, and then notice that it’s at 10 pm. On TUESDAY. (And fine, I know that Skin Prints doesn’t open up until noon, but they aren’t the only ones attending the event! Or maybe they are. I wouldn’t know, since I’m in bed by that time.)

What in the hell is going on around here?

During my college years (aka the ones I’d like to forget and mostly have), I could go to bed at 2 am, get up at 6 am, and show up to work, all bleary-eyed and not showered. I was even kinda functional. I was working in the cafeteria at UWEC, which wasn’t very demanding, I suppose. That helped. As long as I kept an eye on the salad bar, life was good.

All the same, I could pretty much do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, and still manage to get through a day without a steady intravenous drip of caffeine running through my veins and half a bottle of concealer smeared under my eyes. At the time, the “do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted” amounted mostly to drinking and other shenanigans I won’t mention here out of respect to my grandma. Back in the olden days, there just wasn’t that much to do in Eau Claire. Seriously.


    Fast-forward a “few” years (no one needs to know that I’m almost 31 and apparently a “cougar” according to newly advertised drink specials at the Happy Hollow) and I need to be in bed by 10:30 during the week or else it’s bad news bears.

Generally, a “crazy” weeknight for me involves dinner and MAYBE a movie as long as it starts by 7 pm. I have a “real” job now, whatever that means, and can’t show up to an 8 am meeting wearing sweatpants with last night’s makeup still on. I refuse to be “that girl.”

Yeah. I know there are several problems with this situation. Let’s ignore the part where I’m a little bit pathetic. Lyrics from Bob Seger’s Rock and Roll Never Forgets often rumble through my head, especially the ones about being “a little bit older and a lot less bolder than you used to be … so now sweet sixteens turned thirty-one …” And ugh. You get the idea.

Anyway, The bigger problem involves this city and the fact that it decided to get all cool on me. There’s too much to do. And it’s the most awesome problem we have. There used to be ONE awesome event happening on a Friday. And that was maybe just the premiere of Titanic, which doesn’t really count. Now there are too many awesome events happening to even fit on a Friday.

The local music scene has exploded, we have art displays, tons of locally produced plays, screenings of really bizarre films only previously shown on Mystery Science Theatre and the beat goes on. So we’ve gotta spread the love a little and stop ignoring perfectly good Tuesdays just because losers like me get up in the morning and go running.

One of the benefits of having a “real job” is the paid time off I accumulate. I think I’ll start showing up more to late night concerts on Thursday nights and less to work before noon on Friday mornings. Party on, Wayne.