5 rejected categories for the Best of the Chippewa Valley Poll

Tom Giffey |

There are many, many, many questions in our 2013 Best of the Chippewa Valley Reader Poll. These are not some of them ...

1. FAVORITE POTHOLE

Is it the bottomless pit in the parking lot next to the Brackett Avenue Kwik Trip? One of the numerous craters on London Road? There are so many to pick from, this category would simply have been too difficult for voters.

2. BEST CITY COUNCIL HAIR

Parted on the left? Parted on the right? Salt-and-pepper? Rapidly receding? Despite these choices, this category generated only yawns in our focus group. (Sorry, Councilman Duax, there’s always next year.)

3. MOST KID-FRIENDLY BAR

Forget the fake IDs! Wisconsin law allows minors to go to taverns and even toss back a few as long as they’re with a parent, guardian, or spouse of legal drinking age. However, no local bars have tried to tap into this demographic with not-so-kiddy-cocktails or Dora the Explorer-themed happy hours, making this category moot.

4. BIGGEST THREAT TO ASH TREES

Since the days when white pines quaked in fear of Paul Bunyan’s mighty axe, nothing has threatened an area tree species like the long-feared emerald ash borer, which – whenever it does pop up in the Chippewa Valley – will inevitably spell doom for tens of thousands of ash trees. This prospect is so depressing we decided to leave it off the list.

5. BEST FRIEND

Is it that guy we vaguely remember from high school who sends the over-enthusiastic Facebook messages? The high-drama co-worker who we don’t want to offend? Or are we obligated by unwritten relationship law to automatically pick our spouse or significant other? Choosing the Chippewa Valley's best friend would simply be too socially awkward and emotionally draining.