According to local police by way of WQOW.com, a drunk local citizen walked into a gas station and started enjoying the beverage fountain like it was a free All-U-Can-Guzzle buffet. From the story ...

• Police responding to the report of a theft recently say the 27-year-old Altoona man appeared drunk. An employee told officers the man had taken a cup from the counter, filled it and began drinking.
• When employees told him he had to pay for the drink or leave, the man refused to do either.

Then the cops told him to cough up $1.57 for the pop he drank, or he’d go to jail. He chose jail. Upon cuffin’ and stuffin’ the moron, cops found he was carrying $70. Now there’s a guy who sticks to his guns ... his sloppily drunk, gas station attendant harassing guns.