This whole Bon Iver thing is off the hook. Off the chain. Off the tracks. It’s a runaway train, never comin’ back. This is all awesome, of course, but just crazy. The latest spoonful of crazy to be added to the pile is an eBay auction for a copy of our Dec. 4 issue featuring an interview with Justin Vernon. The auction item is titled “Volume 1 Back Issue: Bon Iver Exclusive Interview.”

So far there ain’t no bids. No big surprise there, but the fact that someone is actually trying to make some peripheral money of Vernon’s fame is pretty nuts. It’s not even a signed copy. It’s not even a rare copy. And the article is online.

Just weird.

When I was a chubby fifth grader, my parents moved to Hammond, Wis. for 7 months and my life ended. I went from a tiny Catholic school to a giant rural school. I did not fit in and life sucked. I whined so much that my family moved back to Eau Claire. The end.

Speaking of Hammond, they have an annual llama-based event. Who knew? And according to the Leader-Telegram, Minneapolis short filmmaker Heidi Freier has made a documentary on the event, known as “Running of the Llamas.” Besides filming the llamas, she fell in love with them. Watch as the L-T allows the love story to unfold …

• While filming at two area llama farms, Freier and one of her crew members, Michael Bartsch, unexpectedly became smitten with llamas. Freier said she and her crew enjoyed the days they spent filming the llamas, and the film soon became more than just about the event.
• "The film is a celebration of llamas, a unique small-town event and the people who make it happen," Freier said in a news release.

A celebration of llamas? Hmm. Despite all the llama madness, I still very much dislike Hammond, Wis. It’s nothing personal.

In this episode: Chippewa Falls sells 70 acres (what for?), our local New Year’s baby, Trevor breaks down Xmas tree recycling, and we give away a $50 g.c. to Draganetti’s.

Before you could bowl in your living room on the Nintendo Wii your parents bought you, there was a sport called “actual bowling.” It’s a fact. And people still do it right here in town. In fact, this weekend will see the “premier scratch bowling tournament in west and central Wisconsin,” a two-day tournament called the Chippewa Valley Match Games held at Wagner's Lanes. The Saturday shifts are for qualifying, and the top 24 players return Sunday for Match Play with a winner crowned after a step ladder final. If that makes sense to you, you should be excited, especially since you can still sign up to compete. If none of that makes sense to you, just show up at Wagner’s Lanes on Sunday to see some bowling pins blasted into oblivion by the best competitors – and enjoy the scintillating atmosphere only a scratch bowling tournament can provide. More details here.

If you haven’t had the chance to attend a meeting of the Special Committee to Resolve (County Jail) Space and Site Needs because you’re lazy and uninvolved, have no fear! You can watch ALL the meetings online! It’s all courtesy of our own Community Television. Check it:

• Eau Claire County taxpayers who don’t subscribe to cable TV can still view the most recent jail expansion meetings.  Chippewa Valley Community Television, who videotaped the meetings, will be streaming them on its website on New Years Day.
• The jail expansion programs will be broadcast on Analog Channel 97 and Digital 994 on Charter Cable beginning at 12:45 am.  Audio will be simulcast on WRFP-LP, 101.9 FM.  The web streaming will pick up at 7am on www.cvctv.org. The meetings will run until about 11pm.

So if you’re looking for some amazing New Year’s Day activities, hunker down on the davenport with your laptop and a case of Schlitz and go wild Jail Committee-style.